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  She waited while he assured himself of the place being safe, and then followed him through the door.

  “B, you are thinking so hard it is slamming at my nerves. Say what you want to say already.”

  Her mate slipped off his coat and sank into his favorite chair. A real eyesore, the orange fabric of his seat didn’t really go with the rest of the blues and browns in her home. He’d salvaged it from his grandmother’s home, and B would never tell him he couldn’t have it front and center in their living room.

  She would, however, let him know when he was being a jackass.

  “Andrew.” He really needed to listen to her.

  “Elizabeth,” he answered. “Since we’re doing full names, I thought I should respond in kind.”

  She took a chair opposite him. “You aren’t going to jolly me out of this conversation.”

  “That’s really too fucking bad.”

  “I didn’t say it in front of Ryker, which doesn’t mean I won’t say it to you.” Her head hurt. The last wine at Gee’s might have been one too many. She would have stuck to water if she’d known their night would end with them facing off in the living room.

  He stretched out his legs in front of him, and she couldn’t help but glance at the place where she knew his skin was scarred, always raised, always painful. She loved him. The boy who had broken her heart and come back a grown male she was proud to follow and walk beside. With everything she was, B had loved and would love him all his days.

  She could not lose him again.

  “Funny, you felt free to say quite a lot of other things in front of Ryker.”

  “Aren’t you two best buddies? Shouldn’t we be able to say whatever we want?” She got to her feet. Movement was good. “You have an injured leg. It is the middle of winter. I don’t happen to think the train is that big of a deal, but, since we all take Ryker’s lead when it comes to pack safety, let’s assume it is something to be concerned about. Are you really the appropriate person to go traipsing up a mountain in the middle of a snowstorm?”

  “Yes.”

  The snarl escaped before she could stop it. “Andrew.”

  He rose and walked over to her. His body language was calm, but his eyes had gone all wolf. Deceptively lethal, that was her mate. Not that he’d hurt her; he never would. But Andrew Tao had ways of making her relent. Only Betty had no intention of giving in on this subject.

  She placed her hands on his broad chest. Beneath the white cotton shirt, she could feel his heart beat. “I won’t lose you. Do you understand what it would do to me if you died? I don’t want to talk about the Alpha ramifications. I want to talk about us. You see, I actually know what it is to live without you. Please don’t make me do it again.”

  “And you have so little faith in my abilities; you think walking up a mountain is going to be the end of me?” Drew ran his finger down the slope of her nose. “My mate. My life.”

  She closed her eyes at his words and let him draw her against him. Her bones were tired, and she wanted to sleep for a year. Why couldn’t things better left in the past simply stay where they belonged? Why did they have to come back and wreck her whenever she let her guard down?

  His mouth pressed to hers, and she wrapped her arms around him, heat melting the cold core of her fear. Live in the moment.

  She tried so hard to. All of the time. He was the other half of her soul and he was there. Why couldn’t she let the decade without him go?

  Drew picked her up and carried her over to the chair he’d vacated. She knew where she was even before she opened her eyes. The fabric of the orange monstrosity scratched at her hands.

  He pulled her shirt off; followed by the bra he’d asked her to quit wearing. Her mate wanted her all but naked whenever he could have her. She still wore it to irk him a bit. A girl had to have some control, even when her mate was Alpha.

  With a growl in her ear and his warm breath caressing her cheek, he undid the clasp and threw it to the side. Drew could have torn the fabric from her body. He didn’t—a slight victory to her getting to hold onto some autonomy.

  “Hold onto the chair,” he ordered, and she obeyed. She always would in bed because she needed to as much as she wanted to come; she wanted it to be because he had told her to.

  She gripped onto the scratchy orange nightmare. “I’m not going to change my mind because you fuck me into submission.”

  “I didn’t think you were. I’m still going to, as you say, fuck you until your knees give out.”

  He tweaked her nipples, and they hardened beneath his fingers before he massaged her breasts, bringing a moan from deep in her throat. She had been made for this male, had wanted him as soon as she’d been old enough to, but then so had all the females. The Tao heir. The future Alpha. Only she had seen Drew the man and loved him for all of his flaws.

  She couldn’t see him with her back toward him. “Do you still have your clothes on?”

  “I’m not getting naked. Not until I’m ready. Even then, it might only be my pants.”

  “You’re going to strip me bare and leave yourself dressed? Doesn’t sound fair?”

  He kissed the back of her shoulder blade. “It’s not. I never promised you fair. I will make you come. Hard.”

  As he’d taken off her shirt, he stripped away her skirt. Soon she was as naked as he’d told her she would be. The simple act of being undressed made her quiver. When he finally touched her, pressing his fingers first inside her pussy before he found her clit, she panted.

  “Drew.” She knew he’d understand. He always did and he’d never made her feel weird or ashamed of asking for her desires.

  “Topping me from below. That’s my B.” The laughter in his voice soothed her before his hand smacking her ass causing her to cry out with desire. The second whack made her pussy weep. “You want me inside of you, then you are going to ask me for it.

  She shook her head. “No.” Part of their game. He had to make her, and she wasn’t there yet.

  Another smack on her rear end, this time harder. “Ask me.”

  Betty gritted her teeth with need. If she relented, he’d soothe her after he fucked her into oblivion. But the longer she delayed, the sweeter it would be when she finally gave in. “Not yet, Andrew.”

  Whack. Whack. Whack. She could tell by the way his hand shook with the final spank he wanted her as much, too. As much as she craved the spanking, her mate loved to give it to her.

  “Please come inside of me. Please, baby. Please.”

  She heard him unzip his pants and his shift to get them off jarred her slightly.

  With a strong push that made her knees bend, Drew pushed his cock inside her and after a moment, he was balls-deep and she was panting. With a yank, he tugged her back against his still-clothed chest. “You good?”

  Her mouth went dry. He always checked. When it got rough, Drew made sure she was on board. “Fuck, yes.”

  “Your dirty mouth.” Laughter then pressure as he pressed in and out. In and out. His hands were everywhere, on her breasts, her clit, her stomach. Pumping and surging and finally, when she thought she saw the world shift from the pleasure and pain rocking together inside of her, she came hard around his cock.

  His mouth gripped down on her neck, marking her, claiming his mate as he sometimes did. She didn’t know why he marked on some occasions and then on others didn’t. If the need moved him, he staked his claim, and she was more than good with his choice.

  Drew spent inside her then rested his head on her back.

  “B.” He sighed and, on his lips, the one initial, the beloved nickname he’d given her in childhood, sound like a prayer.

  “You’re still going.” She nodded, pressing her forehead to the orange chair.

  “I need to, my mate. Like I need to breathe. Like I need you. I need to see to Stewart myself. Even if he didn’t leave the train. I want to look him in the eyes.”

  She closed her lids. He was still
inside her, and she didn’t want to fight. “And apologize to him, as you do, for atrocities you had nothing to do with causing.”

  “So protective of me.”

  That was when the thought dawned on her. The answer was simple. Why hadn’t she realized earlier? “Fine. You go. I go. If you’re going to see Stewart and hike up a mountain, then, so help me, so am I.”

  There.

  He didn’t answer for a moment and then pulled himself out of her before turning her over to stare her in the eyes. “You think you’re going to protect me on the mountain? I killed my father. I can manage myself.”

  “I spent ten years without you.” Her voice hitched, and she hated it. “I don’t want to sleep another night without you there.” And, yes, if it came to it, she’d protect her perfectly strong mate from whomever or whatever came at him.

  “Don’t you need to get things ready here for Christmas and the hunt?”

  “Saja can manage the Christmas frivolity.” Betty belonged with Drew. She always had.

  He pushed her hair off her forehead. “I thought you liked the idea.”

  “You liked it. I like that you do. I don’t care one way or another about it.”

  Hugging her, he continued stroking her skin. “It’s bonding for the pack.”

  “Says my mate who lived with the humans for ten years. Wolves don’t need to bond. We oath and we mate. We’re good. But we’ll bond. For our humans. For you. Because they all love you, Drew.”

  Even if the part of her who sometimes sat up at night afraid it was all going to go away wished they were all afraid of him, too.

  Chapter Two

  The car ride with B had gone beautifully. She’d chatted happily about all sorts of topics and he’d gladly listened. The acrid smell of sadness rolling off her in waves the night before seemed gone and for that he’d be grateful. If she wanted to hike the mountain with him, he would enjoy her company. Really, they’d done harder treks as children just for fun. Since his return, they’d never had real alone time together other than when they fell into exhausted sleep every evening.

  “I’d like to take you somewhere.” He interrupted her story about Tasha and the missing oatmeal. Rude, maybe, but he was too excited to wait.

  She raised a light eyebrow. “Aren’t we going somewhere now?”

  “Yes. I mean, obviously. Only, I meant somewhere else another time. Anywhere you want to go.”

  She sat back in her seat. “Where would I want to go?”

  “I don’t know. There must be somewhere.” He’d been all over the United States and Canada when he’d been on the run. So many of their returning pack mates had lived all over. “Surely there is someplace you want to visit.”

  “I’ve seen my parents and Magnolia. Saw their shop. Spent a few nights staying with them.”

  He nodded. “That’s great. I was thinking of somewhere more than just outside of Sioux Falls. Like a place that would take us days to get to by car.”

  His mate chewed on her lip. He wasn’t getting the excitement he expected from his suggestion. “Why would I want to do that?”

  Her question struck him silent. Finally, he answered, “For the adventure of it? For the novelty of seeing someplace new?”

  “We’re wolf shifters, sweetheart. I want to stay home and see my pack get steady. I don’t want to run around having adventures when they might need me there. Why? Are you getting wanderlust for your humans? We don’t have enough loathed to satisfy you?”

  “Have I stepped in a minefield I didn’t know existed?” He laced their fingers together, but she did not return the squeeze he gave her. “Want to tell me what’s going on with you lately?”

  B pointed ahead. “You should leave the car there. We’ll start our hike from beneath those trees. That way someone would really have to look for the car to find us.”

  She was right, but her statement didn’t negate his question. “Avoidance, much?”

  His mate huffed loudly. “You sound like one of them, the humans.”

  After he parked the car, she got out and grabbed the pack she’d filled for the two of them. He held out his hand. Instead of giving the pack to him, she slung it over her back.

  He tried to bite back the flippant remark he wanted to make. Tried, and failed. “So am I totally incompetent? Dying? What is it?”

  She gritted her teeth. “You worry about your leg. I’ll carry.”

  They walked together in silence and for an hour he let himself pretend he was enjoying the cool air, the snow in the trees, and the sounds of birds in the distance. Outside of any town, he didn’t need to worry about anything other than tripping over a log.

  He was giving his mate time to collect herself. Why talking about a hypothetical trip caused her so much angst, he didn’t know. Why she acted like he would collapse at any second, he didn’t know. The only thing he could be sure of was he’d loved B his entire life and they were going to work out, eventually, what bothered her.

  They had to. His mate staying so silently unhappy couldn’t be allowed to continue.

  “One of the things I like about this time of year is the newness of it. At least, that’s how the humans treat it. Even if you don’t celebrate any of the holidays as part of a religion, a few weeks later it’s New Year’s Eve. A chance for a new year, a fresh start. What will happen? You have no idea, but it could be so much better. You know opportunity and potential are just around the corner. Even though, in a lot of places, it’s still so cold.”

  His leg wasn’t bothering him at all; he’d not expected it to, and he casually peeled a piece of bark off one of the trees as he passed. The snow could be rough. But when it went away, everything was reawakened, new again.

  “Do you wish I was human?” She spoke from behind him, and he stopped. Slowly, he turned.

  “Is that a joke?”

  She joined him, her steps tentative...“No.”

  “Why would you ask such a stupid question?”

  His mate growled. “Obviously, I don’t think it’s stupid or I wouldn’t have asked. Never mind.” She waved her hand at him. “Let’s keep moving.”

  Drew grabbed her arm. “I get to answer.”

  “I thought it was a stupid question.”

  He took her cheeks in his hands, gently cupping her face. “Betty Holden….”

  “Tao. Shouldn’t it be Tao? Isn’t that what the humans do? Take their husband’s last names?”

  Okay. He’d officially walked into Betty’s anger and he wanted the why. “Not all of them do. But I’d imagine that’s neither here nor there. And you’re so much more to me than a wife. You’re my entire world, my eternity. I don’t think all human males feel that way about their women. So, Betty Holden Tao. What is going on with you? How could you think for even half a second I would want you to be human?”

  “Everything is about the humans. Making them feel at home. Fitting them in. You’re so happy to have them. Some of us wolves were here and holding the pack together when there weren’t any humans present.”

  He leaned forward, speaking very close to her beautiful red lips. “Have I not been making you feel important?”

  “I don’t need you to cater to me. I want to feel valued for what I am and not have to change into something else to fit into this new version of life you have. There are some things, Drew, that shouldn’t change. They need to stay the same, to keep them safe and treasured. Our pack isn’t a dumping ground for every human or wolf with an issue to come prancing in. We need to value who we are and who we have always been. You’re Alpha. Be Alpha.”Betty withdrew, pulling her bag closer. “Let’s keep walking.”

  He followed. “Are we talking about the humans, or are we still discussing me and my leg?”

  B halted. “I smell wildlife. Do you?”

  “Some.”He sniffed the air. “Not much is going to be wandering around in this weather, which is good for us. Are you going to answer my question?”

  “Yo
u know I don’t usually agree with Ryker. Only, in this case, I have to agree with him. Blood-oathing anyone and everyone who comes back because of some misplaced belief that everyone gets to come home again is going to get you killed.”

  The tremor in her voice left him heartsick. How long had she been carrying around all this worry, and why hadn’t she said anything earlier?

  “When I took over the pack, I made a promise to rebuild what once was.”

  “They got kicked out, Drew.” She threw her hands in the air before she dug into her bag to pull out a bottle of water’s tried to hand it to him, but he shook his head; he wasn’t thirsty. His mate, however, opened the lid and took a big pull of water. “There were reasons they left.”

  He shook his head. “I got kicked out.”

  “Not everyone is you. Magnum was crazy. But even the truly evil aren’t always wrong. Some of the time, they’re going to be right. All I am trying to say to you, my Alpha, is don’t assume every sob story coming through the door isn’t really a maniacal loon with an agenda not congruent with your own.”

  He took a deep breath in through his nose. His hands tingled, a signal his temper triggered at the criticism, yet he had to admit the truth to B’s words. “I appreciate you love me. Your worry matters to me more than I can say. I will try to investigate further those who come in. That’s all I can promise.”

  “If that’s the best I’m going to get, then so be it.”

  They walked side by side uphill. His leg stayed strong. The part of him that liked the color in B’s cheeks when she got mad almost pointed out his strength to her for no other reason than to pick a fight. Yet, her scent had cooled, and her shoulders looked straighter. Better to leave well enough alone until they’d gotten themselves on steadier ground.

  A sound caught his attention, and he stopped to listen. Nothing more than a breaking twig, which could have been caused by local wildlife. Natural predators would avoid them. He didn’t smell any humans or shifters in the area. Squirrels and other animals scrounging for food didn’t concern him much, unless they were higher on the food chain than him and B.